Egg on My Face by Peter Gill

Joan Croll passed away on Valentines Day 2022, aged 93.  Here’s a bridge hand I played against Joan.

         AKJ5
         KQ6
         76
         QJ54
Q76              943
3                   AJ1072
J982             Q53
AK972          106
         1082
         9854
         AK104
         83

   N            W          S           E
Robyn    Helen    Peter     Joan
1C          Pass       1H       Pass
1S          Pass      1NT      Pass
3NT        Pass      Pass     Pass

Directing at Hunters Hill Bridge Club about 15 years ago, I sometimes filled in when someone had to leave early.  In such cases, I usually made extra tricks galore, taking advantage of some of the players’ predictable ways, such as “always taking a king with an ace”.

One such time, without discussing a system, I filled in with Robyn.  I don’t know why my partner Robyn didn’t open 1NT.  Maybe for some reason (misguided on this occasion) she simply wanted me to become declarer.  Her jump to 3NT seemed to be based on massive trust in my declarer play skills.  Could I justify her faith?

I cunningly bid my major suit in preference to my diamonds, making diamonds the unbid suit.  My strategy seemed to have worked well when Helen led my strongest suit - diamonds.  D2 went to dummy’s D6, Joan’s queen and my ace.  I was about to find out that Helen had actually done very well - warned by the bidding - to avoid an opening club lead.

I tried H4 to dummy’s heart king, which won Trick 2.  Based on my previous experiences playing at Hunters Hill, I was very confident that Helen on my left had HA.  With an awkward choice of plays at Trick 3, I crossed to DK to lead another heart. If Helen on my left won the ace of hearts as I expected, any suit Helen played next might help me.

Oops!  To my amazement, Helen had no more hearts.  Joan on my right had cunningly and successfully ducked HA at Trick 2. To my exasperation, Joan rattled off four heart winners, while Helen pitched two spades and two clubs. The ending was:

          AKJ
           -
           -
          QJ5
 Q                  943
 -                    -
J9                  5
AK9              106
          1082
           -
          104
          8

Joan played a diamond.  While Helen cashed her two diamonds, I had to find two discards from dummy.  I let go of SJ, then (alas) C5.  Helen cashed her clubs next for down five.  I contracted for 3NT, but they made 3NT.  My partner said: “Sorry, I should have passed 1NT” as I said “Great defence”.  That was the most spectacular bottom board I’ve ever had when filling in as the Director.

When I arrived home, I googled Joan Croll, discovering that I had underestimated her. Her portrait by John Brack had just been hung in the then new National Portrait Gallery.  The following January when I was in Canberra to play bridge, I dropped in at the NPG.  When I next saw Joan at Hunters Hill, I told her (she hadn’t been to Canberra to see it yet) that in front of her portrait was a nice seat for viewing, whereas then Prime Minister John Howard had no such seating in front of his portrait.

After bringing up her children, at age 47, Joan began a 22-year career as a leading breast physician, promoting breast ultrasound and mammography.

In 1971 Joan was one of 13 local women called The Battlers who saved from developers Kelly’s Bush in Hunters Hill, which now is (I believe) the largest tract of foreshore bush between Sydney and Parramatta.  This was the first green ban in Australia, triggering a decade of green activism and creation of National Parks by other Australians.

Always the activist, Joan later broke the record for most letters written to the Sydney Morning Herald.  Your opponents might look innocent enough, but beware - some of them will outsmart you with expert plays.  Always respect your opponents.  For more information, see https://www.portrait.gov.au/portraits/2001.183/joan-croll/.